A quick, brainless essay:

I just had what I feel is an interesting thought. Most people will admit that villains can often be more entertaining than heroes. They're certainly more grandiose, and their lines are often better. (In fact, if you've read Bruce Campbell's book: If Chins Could Kill, you'd know he once turned down the hero's role offered him to take the villain's role instead - based on the interesting lines.) Where am I going with this? Just a vaguely devil advocation arguing (brace yourselves) that in some respects, Artemis Fowl is more interesting than Harry Potter.

Those italics are tricks, of course: I'm talking about the characters, really: not the books. Some of you out there may be gritting your teeth already, for multiple reasons: you may be a die-hard Potter fain (as am I), you may know I've read all five Potter books, but only one Fowl. So I'm arguing on the basis of one book? Quiet down, you in the back.

Bless him, Harry's such a sweet soul, isn't he? The idyllic hero, in many senses. He follows the modern fantasy protagonist to the letter (I could trace that all the way back to Campbell's monomyth, but I won't just now). He's stuck in stasis, something drops in his lap, and he saves people because of the "chance" encounter. As time goes on he learns more, tries to deny everything (that's the newest book, if you're waiting with baited breath), and will presumably save everyone. Well, save a great deal of people, anyway. I'll take this moment to remind you I adore the Harry Potter books. With that being said: that archetype's a bit stale, really. That's the advantage Artemis has over dear Harry: he's not really a hero. He's quite nasy in his own right, really. He's a very good example of an anti-hero, really. He's not too nice, but he's still the protagonist. And it's usually more fun, just more fun, but perhaps not as satisfying, to watch the villain work. Grand machinations, all that jazz. And admit it: when foolproof plans go off, you get an interesting little feeling inside, don't you? That's really all I'm saying, so I'll be up front about it. Colfer's made a blatantly fun series of books, while Rowling has followed the mythic story. And that's all right. It's just a refreshing sort of thing, to see a book touted as a children's book, when you're rooting for the bad guy.

(And for those of you who've read the book, and are groaning about over-simplification of character and want to bring up his final act with Holly: first, some people might not have read it. Second, yes, I know. So settle down.)

And finally, some comments about generalities. Fantasy is the only genre left where, generally, the protagonist is almost always a "good" guy. Yes, some characters (my own beloved Elric, for example, or Thomas Covenant) are just nasty, and some have mean qualities, but overall they're pretty nice. That doesn't happen anywhere else. In science fiction, anti-heroes of a sort are the norm. Hiro Protagonist is sort-of an elitist hacker jerk (bless him). What what's-his-name, from 1984. He swears to toss acid in children's faces if he needs to, and he has sex with a woman he's not particularly attached to. Thrillers are full of protagonists who are just like the antagonists, with miniscule differences delivering them from the same path. But odds are, if you pick up a fantasy book, there's some guy (who was probably a farmer) raging against an unjust world that's trapped him in a bad situation where he has to (I'm gasping theatrically now) make decisions. (And yes, that's mostly making fun of Rand al'Thor, the whiny baby, but others lie in wait...)

This essay was brought to you by sheer boredom and the reviews on Amazon.com

Hopefully, forthcoming in the future will be my rather large essay (that I haven't started, of course) on Harry Potter alone: how it's the hero monomyth, and why, among other things, certain arguments on the internet are either superfluous or wrong. (Yes, I'm thinking of a specific article or two. I think this one's wrong, though wonderfully well-argued, and all the terribly irate and vitriolic romance arguments are the useless ones.)

Well, I've probably managed to anger lots of people, so my night's complete. Now to take medicine and try to pound out more book.